Can I just say that I LOVED getting this question! Partly because I believe this friend really wanted to know and partly because it was an opportunity to share an alternative to the normal defense mode we Christians go into when we hear it. We're so afraid of coming across as unloving or judgmental*. Someone once said, "Where the early church feared the raised fist, the American church fears the raised eyebrow".
The teenager asked her mom but also went to Google where she found "answers" that were confusing as well articles by Christian authors supporting the homosexual lifestyle including Same Sex Marriage (SSM).
(A little rabbit chasing: Google is a place people go to for "facts" and often find 0pinions presented as such. Gone are the days of looking for cause and effect and the practice of reasoning. Not the ability to reason , for God created that in us. We just don't do it much any more. I pray this changes.)
For an answer to her question to mean anything at all, we need to agree on a number of points:
1. There is a God.
2. He is the author of Truth and it is absolute.
3. He has spoken through Scripture.
4. His desire is for all of us is that we know His will and live it.
5. My purpose in life is to live for Him, not for myself.
6. I will commit to using an unbiased approach to discover what God says, regardless of the consequences.
Scripture and creation have established the first five points. My response to those compels me to agree with the sixth. Those who do not agree with these most basic Christian teachings cannot see the importance of aligning oneself with the Creator and therefore, can only offer up what seems right to them at the time. (They also lose the ability to claim anyone else's opinion is wrong since they believe there is no moral absolute. It then just becomes a discussion of pointless chatter.)
My response to the original question is this:
Do liars, adulterers, slave traders, thieves and other unrighteous people go to hell? Hell is for (unregenerate) sinners. Heaven is for sinners who decide to accept God's view of sin, turn from it, and strive to die to it REGARDLESS of what form it takes and renew their minds which leads to a change in desire and eventually, behavior. That is the response of a heart that accepts the sacrifice of Christ and the ONLY way the atonement of the Blood is applied to us and by which we enter God's heaven. The real issue isn't which sin sends you into hell, it's whether you have accepted the only possible atonement for it.
This isn't just my opinion. It is a condensed version of everything I've found and studied in the Old and New Testaments in the last 14 years.
But let's deal more directly with the teenager's question. Who decides what sexual immorality is? Our God, who does NOT change like shifting shadows, tells us what his standards are for our sexuality in great detail in Leviticus 18, as well as other places. They range from "do not having sexual relations with your sister", to "do not lie with a man as one lies with a woman". God describes these and many other things as "dishonoring, defiling, and detestable". I challenge you to find where He changes His mind on this. There is punishment/discipline that follows. Verse 24 says, "Do not defile yourselves in any of these ways, because this is how the nations that I am going to drive out before you became defiled."
So when we read 1 Corinthians 6:13, "The body is not meant for sexual immorality." It begs the question, what is our body meant for? Glad you asked! Continue reading and 1 Cor 6:19-20 says it was meant to honor God. God spells out for us what that looks like throughout His word.
Some advice: Let Scripture interpret Scripture. Don't buy into semantics on this one, either. Similar to the word "Trinity" not being found in Scripture but the concept is threaded in its tapestry, running a search for "gays go to hell" in your bible software will come up empty, too. However, if you read your bible, you will find throughout that those who are wicked-by God's definition- the sexually immoral, idolaters, adulterers, male prostitutes, homosexuals, cheats, drunkards, foulmouthed revilers, extortioners, robbers, etc.. will not inherit the kingdom of God. (Gen 13Lev 18;1 Cor 6:9-11; 1 Tim 1:9-10; Romans 1:27, are just a few references.) If they aren't in the kingdom of God, hell is the only alternative.
I propose that we ask even more probing questions:
*Do I avoid reading books of the Bible in their entirety because I'm afraid I'll learn my lifestyle or that of my loved ones is conflicted with them?
*Will grace cover my sin of willfully committing/promoting/accepting disobedience to God?
*How real is my salvation if it is easy for me to deny God's teaching?
*Shouldn't I be learning how God defines, "wickedness, unrighteousness and sexual immorality" so I will know how to flee from it?
*Who has determined the definition I use for love? Healthy sexuality?
Ignorance of God's truth is no defense (Romans 1:20) Intentional ignorance, even less of one. (Hebrews 5:14)
There are two big lies that have saturated our culture and plague our ability to boldly but gently answer the question before us:
1. Love, in any form, is equally as valid and good as any other.
2. We are primarily sexual creatures. To deny someone their right to express their sexuality is to deny their humanity.
I would suggest to you love that leads one to remain in practices that, according to Scripture, cause him to be separated from his Father in heaven is not love at all.
More importantly, our value comes from the fact that we are created in the image of God. Our greatest fulfillment and satisfaction will be found not in sex but in an intimate relationship with the Triune God who not only reigns from heaven, but knows you by name.
How we answer this and other hard questions of our day matters. We will be held accountable.
I once counseled with a woman who said she wanted to re-dedicate her life to Christ. She had been feeling disconnected from Him. She also described herself as a lesbian. She had been at a church where they operated from the belief that she could continue living the lifestyle and still be in good relationship with God, but she just didn't feel as close as she used to. I told her that I could no more condone (or agree that God does) living a gay lifestyle, than I could condone my own struggle with cussing, fear, hatred and even sexual sins of my past. Scripture is very clear about how God feels and what he requires. Just like me with my struggles, that are so much apart of my flesh, she'll have to get up every day and decide if she's going to give in to those desires or sacrifice them for the God that sacrificed Himself for her. We may not have the thorn removed until we enter Glory. But isn't Jesus worth it?
I don't know if she is fighting the good fight in this area or not. She may be very much like me- some days more victorious than others. But I can tell you this much- we greet each other with hugs and sincere warmth. When I think about her, I pray for her to have Christ's strength and the intimacy with Him she was missing. I hope that if she thinks about me, she's praying for me to have strength to fight the good fight, too. How I want so much for us both to have sustained, practical victory over these things that seem to have such a hold, to the Glory of God!
I have faith that one Day, we will.
*More later on Biblical judging
Scripture references from Comparative Study Bible, Revised Edition, Zondervan 1999
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